Month: November 2015

Toy Planes

When I first came home from my failed University I was in a deep and heavy depression. Several times I was even on the verge of committing suicide. I remember there was one thing keeping me alive and that was building toy airplanes. It was sort of my one way of survival. There was a lot of mental damage throughout the past year and somehow I was able to get passed it but thanks to my love of Airplanes I had some success. Depression is a life long battle that never seems to stop, from Direct Current electronics all the way to programming Integrated Circuits there is a constant battle. It’s weird though how it only took me 1 year to go from building these tiny things into building servo motors and programming microchips and sensors.

It goes to show you though in your darkest moments the one thing you must do is build a useful skill whether it’d be sewing,plumbing, carpentry anything that can be useful is good. Resorting to drugs does not make a person, it only creates a selfish void in their life. Thinking about my loneliness back then still haunts me to this day and I tend to think a lot about these small things. I don’t know how long I will be reconciling my past, perhaps these memories will haunt me for the rest of my life. All I know is that creating is what brings up society and I will never again bring down society. I’m sorry for my selfishness. I wonder sometimes though perhaps 10 years down the road when my electrical life is at it’s peak will I still look back on that year?

To anyone reading this, please understand I’m not a bad human being. Just was once a lost soul, unfortunately I have 70 more years of make up to do IMG_1176-2.JPGIMG_1178-2IMG_1166


Speaking to God without a single prayer

I’ve been through Catholic school for 7 years of my life. I have memorized the Hail Mary and the Our Father, I remember before every class we would recite them like a sort of written out chant. 

We would say it 5 times a day and yet I never understood one time why we did it.I remember though that questioning why we did it would be considered evil and the teachers would get angry and everyone around you would be horrified. All that did though was make me believe there is no God that everything was a giant script a lot like the pledge of allegiance but to the Vatican. 

Now though I wish to question that prayer,  if anything, was harmful to the belief in God. It actually took down his message and created a fake man made pledge. It’s a lot like repeating a lie and believing it. When you make up a lie out of desperation the first thing you do is repeat it in your own mind of the whole lie and how it went. 

This was not the call to God.Any religion that requires you to pray is not of God’s faith. What I have found useful was reflection and brutal honesty. 

The idea that if I was brutally honest with myself every single day I would succeed.As far as I recall it has worked. Besides thinking of myself as perfect I looked at myself as imperfect and learned as much as possible. I would ask myself honestly did I learn this? And if I didn’t I would sit there until I did. 

The time was long and sometimes the sessions were brutal. I would sit in class even when everyone else is gone and I was the only one there. My electrical chord would be fried and the circuit breaker would be tripped. But I sat there trying to figure it out. 

I believe that the path to God is not through prayer but through brutal honesty of yourself. Stop blaming the world and realize what you are. If you could not get through college because you were smoking dope 99.9% of the time and your rationalization was my family life was rough. Then clearly this was your fault. 

The longer you stay in denial and smoke that dope the more punishments God will give you for your dishonesty. Even though your family life was rough, the only person that suffers is you. The time you waste on blaming the world is time you could be spending being honest and trying to excel in a skill you’re good at. 

They never taught me in catholic school that I was good at electrical work. They taught me that I was stupid because I couldn’t write well or I didn’t like to read Mark Twain. Unfortunately though the public school system has followed the Catholic school system trying to force theory and thus forcing many many people away from Gods pre destined plan. 

People who probably failed out or people struggling in life who feel terrible about themselves. I remember crying every single night thinking I was an idiot. I even called myself an idiot for a long time. But thanks to my technical college LA trade tech I’ve found out I wasn’t an idiot. 

In fact I have a lot to look forward to now.The amazing people I’ve met who have felt that were in the same boat as me showed me I was brilliant and encouraged my love for electricity to the point where I have begun to even build electronics around my feelings. 

I have become what God wanted all along, to merge my love for electronics into my actual human emotions. It was an ultimate transcendence into the idea of God to the point where I have built so much. 

An example would be this flower I built for my Girlfriend. A small motor with a twirling daisy and a 9 volt battery connector along with vynyl tubing had created me into a robot with a heart. I am metal but I have a purely beating heart.

Follow the Path of God or not it is your choice

There is a path that God has laid out in each and every one of us. The path has been pre determined before we were even born. Through our DNA we have been created in a certain way and when we activate this way we will help people in the highest degree. 

Sometimes the path is murky and other times it is clear.We have goals that don’t even follow the path. My path in life I knew since I was a young one was to be an electrician. I remember when I was 9 of reading the biography of Albert Einstein and knowing his life on how electricity has made it wonderful. 

Unfortunately though in my schools they did not teach us anything about it and even discouraged it. I got more into politics and mathematics when I was older without even realizing I wasn’t very good in it but i thought it was my path so I kept trying until I failed out last year. At the age of 20 I have rerouted my path and have found electrical work to be the way to go. I actually never even heard of the word electrician until I enrolled into my technical college. 
How you ever wish to call it whether an atheist will call it physics but I call it God’s path. I have finally found my calling and I get nothing but A’s in my classes for electrical. Believe me I know there are more hurtles and challenges but these are what deepen our desires to go forward. 

Don’t let the shallow assholes of the world distract you from what is real. Twitter, Facebook and all of that social media stuff tends to distract you and incapacitate you from your real path. The real path comes from within. It’s that inner drive within you to build and strengthen who you are. 

The cannabis users and education nazis of the world are nothing but distractions. People who have never really done anything with their lives. They have given up before it has begun. Education nazis only know how to get through the general curriculum of school and then force their opinions on everyone else.

 These English and Political science professors who think they’re so smart are in reality just distractions. They’re there as just a hurtle to climb over just like their opposite counterparts the cannabis users. 

The cannabis users are these lazy hurtles that try and make everyone around them believe what they believe. They take an extremely obnoxious smelling drug that tends to get others around it high. These “people” have no meaning in the work place but they try to force their agenda through political campaigns to legalize their habit. In the end they are nothing more then just another deceptive hurtle you need to jump over to find Gods path.

These are just the general ones. So for the disabled or injured tradesman struggling through this occupation, keep going because you are completely on the right path. Believe me when I say this, prove to the lord you place your trust in him and he shall provide ways to get around the hurtles.  

If you ever wish to talk to me personally I’d love to hear your story my email is 

Looking up

Good news was I found several jobs who wanted me to work in photovoltaic design along with some janitorial jobs. Whatever you can get to gain more hours towards either your journeymans or contractors license. I found another interesting certification, for some electricians I’ve talked about the path into electronics as a good way to go. Look into getting the IPC-610 or IPC-620 certifications which can lead to very good jobs in many different industries.Soldering is fun!  This was some of my first work soldering some PLC sensors to actual boards!  Not the best but they worked which was the important part. Please not when it comes to surface mount soldering to be much more diligent and pay as much attention to detail as possible.