For those lost and angry individuals who become so encompassed into rage and hatred, this is my letter to you.
It’s not your fault and you were never the problem. Life had given you some horrifying struggle, you may want to turn to some dark forces in the world but before you do hear me out and see if you can relate.
My current family life is gone. Both my brother and mother are heavy drug addicts who have lost their humanity to drugs. My brother uses violence as a way of getting what he wants. When he couldn’t get money from me for drugs he would break my electronics and destroy my furniture. Getting into fist fights with him was the only way to stop him but it usually ended in a bloody mess where I would be injured for a month.
My mom would turn a blind eye and said that I had asked for it even though she knows the truth. I haven’t talked to my father for almost 10 months now due to him despising me.
I left my house only 2 months ago and moved into my own apartment, I begun looking for a job and fortunately may have found a good one with a construction company as a construction electrician.
It is a new start but what has helped me through these tough times were good friends and human beings who have been there for me. People who have given me a helping hand and people who have been there to work with my on my work.
Although I seemed friendly to most, I tended to have a gut wrenching hatred of people on the inside. I think to myself that people were cruel and there is no point to them, instead I should just leave the country and go sailing for years on end. However though there was an ugly and dark part of me that has simmered inside me and this is for the people I am talking to who may know what I mean.
You tend to wander the country just hateful of everything around you. You wish and hope for things to fall apart because at the time your life has fallen apart. I understand the feelings of rage where you have to hold it in just so you don’t cause a scene in public or get arrested.
You tend to be bitter from your family situation and have a seething anger to take your rage out on the country, at this point though if you are at the breaking point listen to these words:
It’s not your fault, there are many people just like you who deal with these issues. There is an alternative and that is to find yourself in a different world.
Close down that hate filled website and just click on something that used to make you happy as a kid. That’s what I did:
It’s an old video but I just remember when I was a kid getting bullied by kids at school and terrorized by my dad at home I used to listen to this. Close down that crazy hate infested site and just think of who you once were a long time ago.
God knows your struggling on the inside and he knows your pain. Open yourself to him once again, Christ was the one who had said to keep the innocence of a child in your heart.